The Guys" Rules

Think all the guys out there will echo in favour about
these... Couldn't help laffing reading it... Enjoy. haha
Ladies, i know i have the lady's rules somewhere, will
search it out.. Otherwise, pls drop me the mail if you
have it... haha...

THE GUYS' RULES

>1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If
it's up, put it >down. We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about >you leaving it down.
>
>1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going
to think of it that way.
>
>1. Crying is blackmail.
>
>1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
>
>1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost
every question.
>
>1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help
solving it. That's what we do.
>
>1. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
>
>1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.
>
>1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in
an argument. In fact, all comments become null and
void after 7 days.
>
>
>1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't
ask us.
>
>1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant
the other one.
>
>1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us
how you want it done. Not both. If you already know
best how to do it, just do it yourself.
>
>1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have
to say during commercials.
>
>1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and
neither do we.
>
>1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows
default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit,
not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no
idea what mauve is.
>
>1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
>
>1. If we ask what is wrong and you say " nothing,"
we will act like >nothing's wrong. We know you are
lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
>
>1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer
to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
>
>1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely
anything you wear is fine...Really.
>
>1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless
you are prepared to discuss such topics as sports,
the weather, or Golf .
>
>1. You have enough clothes.
>
>1. You have too many shoes.
>
>1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.